Sun is starting to breakthrough…My secret, silent morning time alone is drawing to a close. Some bird outside is being obnoxious, harping away. Car sounds in the distance starting to signal that the people are on their way.
My dog is hiccuping next to me on the couch. Her body warm and loyal. I like her there.
I’m listening to the quiet that is my home when everyone is asleep and the day has yet to start. When they pop up from their beds they will seek me first. I will have to set aside my quests. I will be snuggles and “good mornings”! I will be toasting and pouring. Nourishing. Serving. Lunch packing and bag loading. Clothes, shoes, and jacket prodding. Time keeper. Transporter. Mood setter. Life liver.

Right now, the mood is still. I’ve been awake for a while. Thinking and writing. Praying. Solving the worlds problems, or at least attempting. So much in my head as usual. Like a knot I sit and work to untie everyday. Pulling free small sections at a time. One big knot of all my stuff wrapped in and through each other. All connected. The God stuff, the food stuff, the beauty stuff, the wife stuff, the mommy stuff, the expectation stuff, the failure stuff, the growth stuff. Where do I begin today?

I came across this quote this morning from Eleanor Roosevelt, “No matter how plain a woman may be, if truth and honesty are written across her face, she will be beautiful.” This one jumped from the screen. Eleanor Roosevelt is most known for famously stating, ” No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” I mean, Eleanor! You speak to me! How did you know that I would need these words? To be truly beautiful and free from the weight of inferiority and comparison, a gal must respect herself and have truth and honesty written across her face. Well Eleanor, I’m all OVER that!

The courage it takes to be honest requires a confidence and assertiveness I have not possessed in my life until recently. Without self-confidence you can’t experience true humility. Isn’t that ironic?
Real humility is not self loathing. Proper humility is courage to look at the truth. Expose yourself, live in the light. Self loathing is another form of pride and self centeredness. Self pity. Without real humility you can’t be taught, you are stuck in the lie, stuck in the dark. Some, without even knowing it. It is in these dark, comfortable caves that we give the consent for others to make us feel inferior. Whether you are a person of faith or not, you can agree that life is a constant battle of good and evil right? The unending pull of either the dark and comfortable lies that keep us chained or the vulnerable, exposing light that offers freedom and true beauty. You would think that the choice would be obvious and easy…yet here we are.

In my roots of beauty “project” where I’ve interviewed 100 of my female friends and family about the origins of their beauty beliefs, one of my favorite questions to ask was, ” who is beautiful to you.” I loved all the answers. Obviously there are celebrities that we can all agree on as being breathtaking. We all seem to appreciate classic beauty, Audrey Hepburn, Marilyn Monroe, Sophia Loren. However, the majority of us offered up our mothers, sisters, grandmothers, aunts, friends.

Life livers.
Honest and true faces.
Beautiful.

I did not ask yet to share this yet so I won’t reveal the name of my dear friend who said it. This was one of my favorite responses, I MUST share.

“Old ladies with crab apple faces and bright eyes who wear loud colors. Women with tattoos who swear like sailors and drink whisky straight. Women who make others feel beautiful in their presence. Women with strong backs and wiry legs. Women with big round butts where each butt cheek moves independently when they walk and whose hips are big enough to hold a child perched on each side. Earth mamas and wild women. Black women with their curls unscarred. Hispanic women with their skin on display. Women from the Pacific Rim without a stitch of makeup. Native American women with their backs held straight and their heads held high. White women with wrinkles and gray hair. Any woman through the eyes of her children.”

Love. Love. Love. Love.

I can my children running upstairs, I know it’s time to fold up shop here.

I feel empowered and grateful to be living life in the light today. Even though it feels naked, it’s honest and true. Won’t you join me?